Unicorn Aspirations — 3 of 5

Volume 2 - Properties and Actions

Farting is an action applying to nothing. Understand "fart", "poot", "toot", "pass gas", "break wind", and "flatulate" as farting.

Burping is an action applying to nothing. Understand "burp", "belch", and "praise the chef" as burping. Carry out burping: instead say "No unicorn ever reached the clouds by belching."

Digesting is an action applying to one thing. Understand "digest [a thing]" as digesting. Carry out digesting:

if the noun is not held by the player, instead say "That would be quite a feat, considering you have not eaten [the noun].";

instead say "Working on it, thanks."

Digesting intransitively is an action applying to nothing. Understand "digest" as digesting intransitively. Carry out digesting intransitively:

if nothing is held by the player, instead say "Your digestive juices grind against each other, futilely.";

instead try digesting a random thing held by the player.

Pooping is an action applying to nothing. Understand "poop", "crap", "defecate", and "poo" as pooping. Carry out pooping:

if nothing is held by the player, instead say "Your digestive tract is completely empty.";

instead try dropping a random thing held by the player.

Xyzzying is an action applying to nothing. Understand "xyzzy" as xyzzying. Carry out xyzzying: instead say "You hiccup, and a particolored butterfly flaps from your mouth and flies away."

Scenery_food is a kind of thing. It is scenery. It is edible. Scenery_food has a thing called actual_food. Does the player mean doing something to scenery_food: it is unlikely.

Chromatic_food is a kind of thing. It is edible. Chromatic_food has some text called a color. Does the player mean doing something to chromatic_food: it is likely.

Does the player mean doing something to a thing held by the player: it is very unlikely.

This is the disallow multiple objects rule:

let L be the multiple object list;

if the number of entries in L is greater than 1:

say "You cannot use multiple objects with that verb.";

stop the action.

The disallow multiple objects rule is listed before the generate action rule in the turn sequence rules.

Rule for deciding whether all includes scenery: it does not. Rule for deciding whether all includes objects held by the player: it does not.

Before eating anything:

if the noun is visible:

instead try taking the noun.

Before tasting scenery_food:

instead try eating the noun.

Instead of smelling scenery_food:

let f be the actual_food of the noun;

if f is an edible thing:

if f is not held by the player:

move f to the location;

try smelling f;

otherwise:

say "You smell nothing unusual."

Instead of taking scenery_food:

let f be the actual_food of the noun;

if f is an edible thing and f is not held by the player:

move f to the location;

try taking f;

otherwise:

instead say "You can't really take [the noun]."

After examining scenery_food:

let f be the actual_food of the noun;

if f is not held by the player:

move f to the location.

To decide what text is foodcolored ( f - a chromatic_food ) (this is foodcoloring):

decide on the color of f.

Carry out farting:

let adverb be "weakly";

let fartbreezes be "wisps";

if the player encloses the beans:

now adverb is "forcefully";

now fartbreezes is "jets of gas";

If the player encloses nothing:

instead say "You haven't got anything with which to generate even a pathetic fart.";

let r be the list of chromatic_foods held by the player;

if the number of entries in r is 0:

instead say "You release a melodious but hollow D-minor fart.";

let c be foodcoloring applied to r;

If the number of entries in r is less than seven:

instead say "You fart [adverb], expelling [c] [fartbreezes].";

if the player does not enclose the beans:

instead say "You poot out a sad little rainbow, which flutters limply to the ground in an A-minor whine before dissipating.";

say "With a deafening C-major chord, you proudly fart a mighty rainbow blast. Slowly at first, but swiftly gathering speed, you lift off the ground, and then zoom into the heavens, rising on a majestic rainbow rocket exhaust.";

end the story finally saying "You have ascended to the skies".

Before taking an inedible thing:

if the noun is scenery:

instead say "[The noun] is too far away to reach.";

otherwise:

instead say "Lacking hands, your mouth is the only way you have to pick anything up, and [the noun] doesn't look very tasty."

Understand "look up" as looking up.

Looking up is an action applying to nothing. Carry out looking up: instead try examining the sky.

Understand "fly" as flying. Flying is an action applying to nothing. Carry out flying: instead try going up.

Before eating an edible thing:

if the noun is held by the player:

say "You already ate [the noun].";

stop the action;

otherwise:

instead try taking the noun.

Instead of dropping a thing held by the player:

say "You haven't digested [the noun] yet."

Instead of taking inventory:

if the number of things enclosed by the player is 0, say "You have eaten nothing." instead;

say "You have eaten ";

list the contents of the player, tersely, giving brief inventory information, as a sentence, including contents;

say "."

The description of the player is "As good-looking as ever: your coat is purest white, your mane thick and flowing, your hooves shiny and strong, and your horn long and fearsomely sharp."

Every turn:

let r be the list of chromatic_foods held by the player;

if the number of entries in r is seven and the beans are held by the player and a random chance of 1 in 3 succeeds:

say "Your stomach rumbles fiercely. It's time."